You've got mail.

Clem writes to ask:

I was directed to your site from yet another sex blogger's, Anal-Amy. I really liked your story that you posted on 23 March.

I had somewhat of a similar encounter with a young woman from Craig's List last summer. It deals with a young girl and an older man, uh, yea, me. It's a bit odd, but the sex was great. Wonder if you'd like to read it, or then, if I should 'blog' it too.
I'm a bit hesitant, as it seems all so tawdry, and frankly, a bit self-centered, but that's what blogging is about, right?
Anyway, I like Amy's blog as it deals a lot with anal sex, and my story from last summer deals with it too, as does yours. Got time for a reply? Your thoughts?

Clem


I love tawdry. You love tawdry. Everyone here is here for tawdry, friend. No shame in that.

I do think that delivery counts for a lot though, and that could make the difference between whether someone's blog reads as self-centred or simply sharing one's truth. Would one be writing to share one's fun and pleasure with others, or with humour, or as a poem, or with gigs of porno, or make it the electronic equivalent of scrawls on a men's room wall? I suspect that if the writer is being self-centred, that's what would probably result showing through the blog.

Me, I try to write from a place of fun, sensuality, and sharing for the sake of it. I want readers, and especially women readers, to have as much fun as I am. Sometimes I write from my Top headspace. Sometimes I write raw and explicitly. But I always try to demonstrate the respect and genuine affection I feel for my partners, and even if I'm just commenting on the sexy ass of some woman I see during my day, I want to write from a place of real appreciation rather than leering objectivication. Unless the leering is part of the fun.

But that's me, no better no worse than anyone else. If and when you write, let it be from the place in yourself where you're having fun. There will be people who will want to read it.

I think sexblogging can be an empowering experience. We live in a culture where our sexuality is heavily governed by billions of media messages that command us to act and think and stylize and live in certain ways. Both men and women are constantly feeling judged and underappreciated for who and what they are, what they get off on, what they fantasize about, what they really want in their lives when they stop looking at billboards and reading magazines.

I think sexblogs are awesome because people can be themselves. For women (I imagine), this can be liberating because women's sexual voices have been repressed and controlled for so very long. Thanks to visionaries like Nancy Friday, Erica Jong, Susie Bright, Xaviera Hollander, Camille Paglia, and many others, that's been changing. (And I think women are fucking hotter for it.) For men, I think this can be liberating because it affords us an opportunity to be sexual outside and away from the media images we're forced to accept as solely legitimate for what we're supposed to like, if we choose to.

And I believe any opportunity we have to use media to be ourselves, rather than some corporation's reconstituted image of what it means to be ourselves, is deliciously subversive and healthy.

So, dude, write. Tell us about your first time and how goddamn scared you were. Tell us about the time you saw stars when you came inside her amazing pussy. Tell us about the time your spouse blew you in your car when you were dating. Celebrate your sexuality because you can, because you have a right to, and because the rest of us sluts want to get off for chrissakes. Help us out!

As for your young girl experience from Craigslist, hey, I can tell you that Shayne loves the Daddy scenario, and I'm sure we'd love to learn all about it, you bad boy, you.

And I really enjoy Anal Amy's writings as well. Such a deliciously naughty tart, no?